Small shifts are impactful, & underrated.
It is a beautiful, well-intentioned desire to attain our big goal immediately upon discovering what this goal is. Sometimes, “eyes on the prize” is a great means to make progress. Sometimes, however, progress may also require an actionable plan: baby steps.
I can hear the groans (from myself, too): “ughh baby steps!? I want it now! Why can’t I just go all in?!” Well, you can. And, in my experience, working tirelessly toward one big picture goal doesn’t always lead us to success of this goal - for a variety of reasons. Maybe I lose focus, I can’t tell progress is being made and lose motivation, I feel the goal is too far out of reach and give up, I’m at a loss for what to do so I do nothing but stare at the goal like that alone can make it happen…
Consider how businesses & students break down big projects. Yes, sometimes big projects are assigned with one end-date and that’s that. However, oftentimes projects are broken down into small tasks. Brainstorm the paper concept, sift through the research, get the idea approved, outline the paper, write section one, write section two, write the conclusion, edit, add graphs & imagery… Each step is a useful indicator of the big-picture goal, which remains the focus - and because each step is small, there is an immediate feedback loop of progress & alignment toward the ultimate goal. Is this working? Are we on track? Is this still aligned with our purpose?
Furthermore, a ladder approach to goal attainment reduces overwhelm and invites opportunity for celebration along the way - to experience the goodness that already exists, rather than buy into the belief that you cannot be happy/satisfied/successful until the big goal is achieved.
Here’s an example: let’s assume your goal is to embody self-confidence & your current thought pattern is “I don’t trust myself.”
Our brain has been trained for years to believe our current thought pattern. Potentially for our entire lives, we have gathered data to back our present belief, “I don’t trust myself,” and because of this - we have a lot of ammunition to grip our present belief as fact. Furthermore, if gremlins come up or if autopilot is on, our go to will be what we know - the engrained pattern. “I don’t trust myself.”
A big shift would be to adopt the belief, “I am absolutely confident in every decision I make” or even, “I am confident in myself.” And while this may be your ultimate desire, in my experience a shift this great can feel overwhelming, fire up fears & gremlins to such an extent that we can’t hear anything else, and results in an ultimate “failure” to adopt the new belief.
What would it look like to adopt a small shift? For example, rather than shifting from “I don’t trust myself” to “I am confident in myself,” what if we adopted: “I am capable of trusting myself.” This new belief still walks you closer to your ultimate goal of self-trust, & does so with a more approachable, actionable path.
Small steps are all about shifting into something you can truly believe in the present moment. A stretch, a shift from the present, and honest. By fully adopting the small, accessible shift - “I am capable of trusting myself,” we create a new pattern; we can start to gather evidence (& new ammunition) toward a different belief than the old. Then, make another small shift; one small decision at a time: “I trust I chose the right orange juice,” “I trust my desire to go for a walk,” “I trust my sleepy eyes.”
Eventually, these small shifts grow until you’re living in the ultimate desire, undoubtedly & completely: “I trust myself.” This might take days, or weeks, or months, or years. Regardless, in my experience, it is a combination of small shifts along the way.
An example of how small shifting looks within a coaching relationship could be as follows: If a client’s big goal is to quit their job, I would never start session one with: “okay how will you quit?” In addition to inducing overwhelm or fear, I am not certain this prompt & action may be beneficial for my client. In addition, if my client had an answer to that question - they wouldn’t be talking to me! So, instead, we might start session one by diving into the current experience: what is the discomfort? During our next session, after having a better understanding of exactly what is uncomfortable & how that feels - we can explore what beliefs & values underly this experience to gain clarity on why the discomfort exists. Next, we may explore what the alternative, comfort, would feel like; what is that experience like, how does it feel, and what values & beliefs can we gather from this knowledge? Moving forward, we can develop an action step toward one way to step out of discomfort, and one step into comfort.
Although the big goal remains a centerpiece for our work together, we have the opportunity during & after each baby step to revisit: does the big goal still feel aligned with what’s actually discontent & desired? If so, we can create an action-plan not only based on the general sense to quit, but on moving out of the beliefs, experience, & values that felt misaligned and toward greater alignment.
Alright - last example 😂 (Ladies and gents - this shows up everywhere.) When I teach yoga, especially yin, I constantly remind my students to breathe and relax. What this requires, of course, is for my students to find a space where it is possible to breath & relax. If students are in a stretch where they can’t breathe, or are forcing something too intense - bodies revert to a mindset & reaction of fight or flight; the mind & body tenses up, and students no longer benefit from the intended stretch. Alternatively, if students find a layer of stretch (make a small shift) that is “stretchy” & breathable, the body & mind can relax & gain a magnificent release.
In life, coaching, & yoga - we need to invite small shifts where we can still breathe. Fear or resistance my still appear, that is totally normal, AND small shift fear is not so overwhelming that we’re in fight or flight against it. We can be with it; we can breathe. This is the process toward big goals.
Little shifts provide evidence that we are shifting, opportunity to enjoy transformation, and perspective to see the overall attainment of our big goal. So I invite you to get specific, shift small, celebrate the little successes, and experience your growth within and on the other side of each baby step. And then, just like in a 6 month relationship, having a space to celebrate the culmination of all your small shifts & the attainment of your big goal.
Dream big. Step small. You’ve got this.
