Yes& by Marin | Joyfully Financial Speaker + Joyful Budgeting Coach

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{65} Write Your Own Damn Rules

Dear Reader,

Go to dance class.

Do what makes you feel alive. Do it even though it scares you. Do it even though time feels sparse & your wallet hesitates to cough up the $15.

Move your body in ways that feel good - regardless of outcome or judgement or your own historic stories.

Run around the block - or run two steps and walk the rest.

Cry in the shower & repeat your favorite song until your tears subside. (They will.)

Give your boyfriend a hug with morning breath. Look at him with tired eyes & say “thank you. “

Cuddle with your puppy, & feel pissed off when he rips your jeans.

Call a friend you haven’t spoken to for years.

Re-invite your mother into your life - for a list of reasons, or no reason at all. On her birthday, or mothers day, or just another Friday.

Eat ice cream for breakfast & play guitar in the middle of your workday.

Break the fucking rules.

Rewrite your rulebook & throw it into a bonfire to remind yourself it’s all made up.

Join a beach body program & complete one five minute exercise. Celebrate with popcorn & a movie. Notice if this makes your feel more energized, or depleted.

Do more of what makes you energized.

Soak in moments that suck. The heartbreaks & mile 3s & “I’ve been applying to jobs for five month” confessions.

Tell your friends you need them. & when their expectations feel heavy, tell them you love them & draw a firm boundary: “I no longer need your opinions. Thank you.”

Quit the job, & ask to be rehired.

Move cities, & fall in love.

Move cities & return home six months later.


Dear reader, where did you get the idea it had to be a certain way?

When did you decide what was “right,” what you “should” do, what’s not allowed?

Why are you living by a nonexistent standard?

You are fighting for your own suffering. You are making it harder than it needs to be.

That isn’t to say attending dance class is comfortable (or maybe it is). Rather, I’m reminding you this is SIMPLE.

Write your own damn rules. Make decisions because they feel good for you. When YOU feel confident about them, that is all that maters.